I'm upset that MJ died and all but waking up to his face on my HDTV in the middle of the night while half-asleep is pretty much the scariest fucking thing ever.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
