I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
Saw a sign earlier "Domino's Lava Cakes $3.00" and I thought of you. This text brought to you by thing I don't need to know about your sex life.
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
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