The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
My dick has a subreddit
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
Randomize
