your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
sorry didn’t mean to call you, i was just trying to put the t-rex emoji beside your name
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
