Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
figured you should hear this from me. Your refrigerator door is way broken. I opened it last night when i was drunk and tried to climb the shelves. i got to the one with the mustard.
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
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