I created a new tequila drink. it is a mix of excitement and fear instilled in innocent people.
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
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