so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
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