I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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