you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
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