i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize