Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
What drink are we having for lunch?
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
Randomize
