Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
You layed on my kitchen floor with a pile of m&ms at your crotch, said "your lightbulb don't match, is that one new?"
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
