Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
I really hope you get sexually violated by a pterodactyl tonight.
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
Randomize
