Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
Last night i stole a disco ball from a frat house by pretending i was pregnant.
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
