actually, I'm a sock model
Umm I'm too high to move.
Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
Randomize
