Got a toothbrush?
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
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