no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
I spilled a beer on myself, so I went back to my place to change. The city marshall was at my door with a warrant. That beer cost me 760 bucks.
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
A reply to my tweet is getting more likes than mine, the disrespect is real
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
Randomize
