Dual....:-)
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
Randomize
