my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
two words: eviction party
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
Ran into a tinder match at the bar last night. We spotted each other and started making out without speaking any words to each other. Fuck yea technology!
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Randomize
