we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
So this is completely apropos of nothing, but I have a feeling that a friend of mine might be a good match for you. Can I set you two up on a date? Oh, and it seems that we live a block away from each other and aren't having sexy times. This is ridiculous. By the way, there's a chance that I might be a tad drunk. Still though, there's a very *good* chance that you and Mr. X would get along.
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
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