fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
Randomize
