I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
i've created a new STD.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
Randomize
