Yea I just took my 1st pregnancy test. Turns out I am just fat. Also I haven't been with anyone in 3 months, which is clearly making me crazy.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
Randomize