talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
He's giving me the absolute bare minimum amount of attention. Like whatever motherfucker, I've had like six super likes on tinder today
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