I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
when I woke up the last searched thing on my phone was "how to make a fireproof dress" I need to stop drinking.
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
