Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
