I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
We spent three hours cleaning our room this morning. It was spotless and smelling good. I come home from work tonight and she has already smoked weed in it and "accidently" spilled vodka on the floor.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
Randomize
