if you are receiving this text, you are one of the people i hate
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
Randomize
