your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
You can't motorboat a personality
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
you were passed out so I asked you what my name was and you opened your eyes and yelled "ricotta cheese"
no way
that's when i decided you were gonna be okay
I just need you to stay far enough away that I can't smell your cologne. I completely forget that I fucking hate you as soon as I smell it.
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
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