you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
Randomize