All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
I just took the kind of shit that makes your eyes well up with tears as you feel it moving inside of you... So cleansing.
As your only female friend, I feel the need to inform you that texts like these are why she dumped you.
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
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