Well douche your snatch and let's go!
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
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