How was your Memorial Day?
Don't remember... but I do have an American flag painted on my boob signed by a Staff Sargent... Oh God, I hope that's his military rank and not a nick name.
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
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