the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
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