no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
Randomize
