My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
Are we still banned from the library?
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
Holy shit, Uber is testing a service to summon an ice cream truck.
Bring me the penis of the founder so I may endlessly fellate him. Or cunnalinge. I don't discriminate.
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
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