and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
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