I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
How do you tell an ex that banging less hot chicks than me is highly insulting? I almost want to try and get him laid with a pretty girl just to save some face for dating him so long.
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
Randomize
