Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
You promised me a handle of vodka if I took home her ugly friend. Thanks to law class I took for the 2nd time I know that's a unilateral contract asshole
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
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