she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
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