I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
Randomize
