apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
