so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day.
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
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