We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
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