You're earring is so big in my mouth
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
Randomize