Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
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