i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
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