thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
I am stoned and watching Pocahontas. I am letting the kids eat whatever they want. I am the best babysitter in the whole wide world
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize