its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
tell me about the eggs
Randomize
