she woke up with a sticky ear
Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
Vodka?
Forever.
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Randomize
