your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
I just met a guy from Australia at the bar. I asked him what it was like down under and he told me if I went home with him he'd let me find out. I love Australians.
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
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